How do you answer the best questions of your children?

Anna asked me the other day why Jesus had to die. She often asks about the soldiers that killed him. I have also been about suffering, pain and sickness. These are some of the best questions I have ever had to answer, but also some of the most difficult ones, because they are ultimately about the meaning of life. They are the deepest questions anybody can ask, but often adults do not have the courage to ask themselves.

As children grow older these questions change too, and maybe more concrete. Why can I not receive communion when I am in mortal sin? What is mortal sin anyway? What does the Church teach about capital punishment or self defense? How can God's love and justice be reconciled? Why does he condemn certain people to hell if he is a loving God? And the questions go on and on.

But how can I answer these questions? They usually come in unexpected moments without time to prepare to give the perfect answer. Even if I do know the answer I might ask myself several other questions related to the matter while I am giving the explanation, and I hope that my audience will not put them to me. One answer usually opens up a whole new world of questions. Peter warns: "Always be ready to give an explanation to anyone who asks you for a reason for your hope" (1Pt 3:15)

Unless I have the courage to inform myself about these matters I will be caught off guard. It takes courage, and yes, often humility to recognize my ignorance. Sometimes the answer is simple to find, while other times it may not be found summarized in a few sentences in a book, but need to be meditated upon.

There are some great resources that one can use to know how to respond to these 'big questions'. For any Catholic the Bible and the Catechism of the Catholic Church (or the Youcat, which is an easy-to-digest way of reading the Catechism, especially aimed to young people) are a must. While they are both  available online (I have not found the Youcat online yet), you really need a printed copy or at least one on your iPad. It is also important to have some book of apologetics. I have found Apologetics and Catholic Doctrine by Archbishop Michael Sheehan very useful, but there are other good ones available.

With a good, albeit small core 'library' I can start to answer my children's questions, and be their hero not only in games, but also of faith.

The greatest inheritance and the greatest gift

My children are fascinated when I turn cherry tomatoes into sun-dried mangos, or when I pull one out from behind their ears. My son thinks daddy can do it any time, so he often appears holding a tomato in his little hand, asking me to turn it into what he really likes. This is my fishy way of doing transubstantiation.

This got me thinking of what was the greatest gift I could give my children. I can hardly be a magic trick, even if they show so much enthusiasm when I do it. It could be the time spent with my children, which is also precious, and it is definitely more of a gif, because it requires giving not only something I have, but the giving of my time and attention. Helping them acquire habits and grow in human virtues is even more important, as it does not only last in their memories, but will help them for life. However, it is only faith in Christ that will help them to reach eternal happiness.

Faith in Christ as Holy Mother Church teaches it has been passed down to us from the first followers of Christ, and it has been defended sometimes with apologetics, other times with sword, but always with firm conviction. This is the best I can give to my children too. At the end of the day what matters is whether they are saved or not.

While teaching the doctrine is essential, faith can't be handed down as a magic trick, and cannot be acquired from a textbook, but it needs to be lived out every day. It is how you pray, work, interact with family and entertain yourself.

A picture is worth a thousand words, and I think this one captures it quite well.

In the meantime I continue turning tomatoes into mangos. It might come in handy to give them a vague idea of the real transubstantiation.